Who is Travis......

I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice. I have been known to remodel train stations on my lunch breaks, making them more efficient in the area of heat retention. I translate ethnic slurs for Cuban refugees, I write award winning operas, I manage time efficiently. Occasionally, I tread water for three days in a row.

I woo women with my sensuous and God like harmonica playing, I can pilot bicycles up severe inclines with unflagging speed, and I cook 30 minute brownies in 20 minutes. I am an expert in stucco, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in Peru.

Using only a hoe and a large glass of water, I once single handedly defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of army ants. I was scouted by the Mets, I am the subject of numerous documentaries, and when I am bored, I build large suspension bridges in my back yard. On Wednesdays, after work, I repair electrical appliances free of charge.

I am an abstract artist, a concrete analyst, and a ruthless bookie. Critics worldwide swoon over my original line of corduroy evening wear. I dont perspire. I am a private citizen, yet I receive fan mail. I have been caller number 9 and have won weekend passes.

Children trust me.

I can hurl tennis rackets at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. I once read the Star Wars trilogy, Moby Dick and the Chronicles of Narnia in one day and still had time to rearrange an entire dining room that evening. I know the exact location of every food item in the supermarket. I sleep once a week; when I do, I sleep on the couch. While on vacation in Canada I successfully negotiated with a group of terrorists who seized a small bakery. The Laws of Physics do not apply to me.

I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. Years ago I discovered the true meaning of life, but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only the George Foreman grill and a toaster oven. I breed prize winning snails. I have won bull fights on San Juan, cliff diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. I have played Hamlet, I have performed open heart surgery, and I have spoken with Elvis.

But I have not yet won the MASS Series.

Fair Hill July 16th

After a wonderful day of racing at Fair Hill I got a chance to meet up w/ fatmarc who created the vivalasinglespeed blogspot for the defunk Singlespeed class of the Mid atlantic super series. His wife, chunky monkey, was kind enough to snap this shot for us! Marc is just one example of the many great people who attend the MASS races, which is alot of the reason I travel 4+ hours average to these events.

Well here it is....... my first posting on the new blog site. As my webcreator Jesse said, "its pretty easy" and I must agree. SInce the Dirty Harrys site doesnt get updated often enough I felt the need to get moving on something where I can post race reports and results on a regular basis.